Unapologetically You: An Experiment to Create a Life Worthy of Your Love

February, after all, is the month of Love.

This month, the love you have for others can be easily showcased for all to see with a dozen red roses, heart-shaped chocolates, and a sappy Hallmark card.

It’s easy to express our love for others — what’s not so easy is to show love to ourselves. That one requires a bit more agility, compassion, and for some a complete over-haul in all things from image to status to self-perception. That’s a heavy load.

But if you’re willing to do something about it, to muster up the courage to give yourself a chance, a chance to begin to love yourself by listening to your deep inner self — the things that once seemed impossible become a little possible. When you stick with it, they become even more than a little possible. You begin to believe it, and when that happens, you become unstoppable.

But it starts with taking that first, wobbly, uncertain but filled with faith step. You gotta have faith — even a smidge will do in the beginning.

This month, for myself and anyone else who could use a nudge, a push, or a boost from their own inner being to start living more in tune with their passions, who are ready to raise their standards and live with more direction and purpose, we need to begin living more unapologetically. For me that means guilt-free from all the mom guilt. It means putting me first, and refusing to scratch myself off that list.

If you’re up for the challenge, join me.

The goal is to take the month of February — the month of love — and turn it into the month I do the things I’ve feared the most. I’m ready to put myself out there and see what I’m really made of. Limiting beliefs, no longer welcome.

February is the month of becoming Unapologetically You. Or me! This is the month we set our sights firmly on our goals, and we finally go after them, unapologetically!

And it begins with a word.

Self-discipline.

I know it’s not what you were expecting, you may have thought we would start off with a word like grateful, or love, or patience! Wouldn’t that be easier? Agreed!

But we’re not doing easy! This is the month we’re taking our monkey brains — our over-anxious, over-scheduled, always busy superbrains — and slowing them down so we can begin to listen (and hear) our wise inner being who sees all the running around we do… and laughs.

So what does self-discipline mean?

Discipline is choosing between what you want now, and what you want the most. — Abraham Lincoln

It’s refusing to eat the cookie, even though we really want it now! It’s getting the workout in, even though we really want to sit on the sofa after a long day at work. It’s not having the conversation that is going to talk us out of doing what we know is good for us.

It’s deciding what we’re going to do and following through on it. No more “I’m too tired” or “I earned this reward because I’ve been so good!”

Self-discipline is raising your standards and holding yourself accountable to those standards.

How to be self-disciplined.

If you want to lose weight, it’s the self-discipline that’s going to stop you from eating your kid’s leftovers. It’s the self-discipline that’s going to have you closing the kitchen at 7:30 pm if night time snacks are your weakness. It’s doing the workout even though you don’t want to.

Feelings are never taken into consideration because self-discipline doesn’t care how you’re feeling. Feelings get in their way.

Action step.

Take a moment to quiet your monkey brain and figure out what it is that you want most in your life. (i.e. I want to take time to write/journal, to start a hobby, do some crafts, eat less sugar, lose weight, workout more.)

Then think of one thing you can do that supports it (i.e. block time off in your schedule, go to the craft store and buy a glue gun, clean out all the cookies and junk in your pantry, put your workout clothes on first thing in the morning — I mean, we’re all wearing yoga pants every day so you’re already halfway there!)

And finally, find yourself an affirmation that’ll keep you focused.

Either use the wise words of Abe, or come up with your own, like, “I have control over my actions”, or “My self-discipline keeps me focused”, or “I have self-discipline so I’m not gonna do that!”

Having self-discipline is the first step to becoming unapologetically you!

Good luck and I’ll be back tomorrow with another word of the day. Now go out and be Unapologetically You!

AM Costanzo is a wellness coach, a motivational junkie, loves a-ha moments, and loves to help people feel strong, powerful, and downright fabulous in body and mind!

I write about wellness, weight loss, and creating healthy habits. The ability to have a healthy and happy life lies within you! www.amcostanzo.com

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